This has been one crazy roller coaster. It's been a while since I've written, and I want to thank people for the emails asking if I was ok. I was and am unbelievable...I just had a lot of stuff on my plate that I needed to take care of.
The last few months were a huge learning experience for me. I was up against it in more ways than one...and I'm not completely out of the woods yet, however, it was a great opportunity to put into practice many of the things I've been talking about.
I was having difficulty adapting to and learning a new sales job I have, and became aware of many weaknesses I had not been aware of since I had been in my last job for twenty five years. I saw there were areas I had learned to work around...shortcomings that may have been a result of my traumatic brain injury. There were areas where deficits may have been "covered up" since I was working in a family business. There were things that I didn't think would be a problem, but turned out to be difficult.
I basically had to start from the beginning, not get discouraged, and not lose my composure. My success would only come by taking one small step after another small step, and I was hit smack in the face with the idea that, thirty years after my TBI, my growth and recovery were never ending.
Most of all, behind any frustration or dissapointment, I was filled with the exhilaration of being vital and alive. I made up my mind that I was going to succeed. That said, I wouldn't have been able to come this far without the continued support of my two managers, for which I am very thankful. We are not islands, out on our own, but we need to give and get support along the way and acknowledge those who give it to us.
Too many people who have suffered TBI are left alone to succeed or fail. Enrolling others to understand or help is key to, not only success, but being a human being. I may ultimately not be successful at this, although I really don't consider that an option. My success is not only for me, but it is also a way of thanking those who believed in and supported me.
This is not about deficits or head injuries...it is about fighting the battle of life. It is about being present to accept yourself as you are and to move on. Let's try to forget what we once were and focus on what we have and can become.
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